the first shot


           The first shot   



          Police and reporters stand around me and call me inspirational; I sure don’t feel like it since I just shot a man.

                “Jenna, make sure you lock the door and don’t forget the gun.” My governess Katie says. Always guns, well that’s what happens when you’re the daughter of millionaires. I lock the doors and lie down pulling the blanket over my head. Then the lock clicked and in climbs a man wearing a mask. He starts driving and I lunge for the gun. I shoot hoping my aim is straight. It is. I slam the brakes. The realization washes over me, I’m a killer. 

Comments

  1. HarryPotter20 October 2016 at 10:59

    1.for the sentence, "He starts driving and i lunge for the gun." is he driving a car? You should change it to, "He starts sprinting towards me, i lunged for the gun."
    2.You should change this sentence, "always guns, well that's what happens when you're the daughter of millionaires,'' to, ''Always guns, well that's what happens when you're a daughter of a millionaire."

    But its all just a suggestion.

    ReplyDelete
  2. 100wcbyWonderWoman20 October 2016 at 11:09

    number 2 was my original sentence but then i had to cut down on words

    ReplyDelete
  3. sarah20 October 2016 at 11:16

    awesome story I think you should put that cama

    (.....and lie down, pulling the blanket......)

    ReplyDelete

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